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Wednesday, May 29, 2013

Cleaning Tips For The Stay-At-Home Dad

For many new dads, a little one can be very trying on one's gag reflex.  As your little boy or girl gets older, rest assured that your stomach will eventually get stronger as well.  Until then, the sight or scent of any bodily fluid in the home could easily turn one pool of vomit into two.

Nothing smells (or looks) worse than cat puke.  Depending on it's location in the house, you have no way of knowing if it came from the kid or the cat.  Is that a puddle of puke or shit?  That can't all be hair, could it?

Here are the steps for a stress free (and gag free) cat vomit cleanup:
  1. Stay as far away from the cat puke as possible.  Don't look at it.  Don't get close enough to smell it.
  2. Quarantine the cat to the room said cat puke is located.
  3. Take the dog for a walk.
  4. Give your child a mid-morning snack.  Unless, of course, the cat vomited in the kitchen.  In that case, it's sundaes and playland at McDonald's.
  5. Check email.
  6. Watch third 'Doc McStuffins' episode of the day.
  7. Don't forget to feed any fish/hamster/turtles in the house.
  8. Put on underwear for the day.
  9. Take shower.
  10. Put on pair of dry underwear.
  11. Stare blankly at the television screen with your son or daughter, through mini-marathon of 'Yo Gabba Gabba'.  
At the end of step 11, return to the room where the cat had vomited.  There should be no sign of the original mess.  If puke is still on the floor, lock cat back in room for an additional two hours, then check again.


  1. See, here's where it's nice to have two cats. It magically disappears faster!

  2. Lucky for you the cat ate it back. However, I wouldn't recommend leaving cat puke there on the floor or disasters could happen especially when you have kids running around the house. It's really important to clean up after their mess especially when you live in homes like Culver City apartments where you are expected to be a responsible renter/pet owner.